ADVENT'S UNLIKELY OFFERING

Journeying seems so challenging, so exhausting, so fruitless at times. I have wondered this month if I am only, "Santa's helper," or a "handmaid of the Lord." The latter seems unlikely. I have baked and struggled, wrestled with self and welcomed others, but I have yet to make it  to the manger. The mall, yes, the grocery, many times, the parties, as best as I could. But the manger eludes me- I seem to be on the road to Bethlehem, but not arriving.

My heart seems a thousand steps behind me, the pace of life and its lures seem to slow my footsteps. Of course I am tired, aren't we all, but the call still comes from Hannah's haunting prayer: "I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of Him. So now I will give him to the Lord. For his whole life he will be given over to the Lord." 1 Samuel 1:27-28

Can I offer back to God the very gifts I prayed for? With a half-frozen heart I walk Advent steps towards Bethlehem and I realize Mary struggled as I do. Her life, her love, her family, other's concerns for her all had to be sacrificed on the way to bring the Light of the world to the Inn. Mary, indeed, was the Savior's first refuge, filled with grace she offered Him shelter under her heart, near her soul.

Can I shelter Him in my heart or will I continue on wearily walking through the motions of the Christmas chaos? My heart begins to thaw as the pain of offering all He has given finally touches me. I have numbed this emotion with baking cookies and sewing  matching pajamas; now I know I must go myself to the Inn and see the Christ-Child born. I cannot continue on the road, busy myself with passing time, so I allow the sadness of this great offering to hasten my feet to kneel at His. He alone can heal the sin and sorrow of the  world. His joy comes breaking through my Advent anguish.

Medicine from Sacred Scripture:

"Comfort, comfort My people, says your God.

Speak tenderly to Jerusalem, and proclaim to her that her hard service has been completed, that her sin has been paid for, that she has received from the Lord's hand double for all her sins."

 Isaiah 40:1-2