ADVENT'S GOOD NEWS

A tiny slip of paper wakes me from sound sleep: my list. Raspberry layer cake, appple pie, cinnamon rolls, cookies yet to be rolled out, a few presents that still need sorting and wrapping. This is nothing new- there really is nothing new under the sun, or under today's cheerless gray sky, but how to handle the stress and seemingly endless errands and preparations for the holidays?

I can make my heart ready for this day, for this task, for these duties, for family and friends and the guests God brings. I know you would say I can shorten my list, but that would grieve my heart, for it is my passion, but I can sit in God's presence and strengthen my heart to bear the gifts of giving without the weight of worry and resentment. How?

"My heart is ready, O God; I will sing, sing your praise. Awake my soul... I will thank you, Lord, among the peoples. among the nations I will praise you, for your love reaches to the heavens and your truth to the skies." Psalm 108

Faintly, in the reflection through our sun room windows, our Christmas lights appear outside on this dreary day. So too, in my life, Christ's light shines from within me to dimly display the glory of His love to a needy world. My choice is to see the day, with all its chaos and caroling as His, and know the truth that reaches these foggy New England skies: His love reaches to the heavens and has come down from the heavens to touch us and heal us, bringing hope and joy and peace. He brings me His love and lifts my weary head. "He is my glory and the lifter of my head." Psalm 3:3

My heart is ready. Is yours?

"Come thou long-expected Jesus, 

Born to set thy people free

 From our fears and sins release us, 

Let us find our rest in thee.

 Israel's strength and consolation,

Hope of all the earth thou art;

Dear desire of every nation,

Joy of every longing heart.

Born thy people to deliver,

Born a child and yet a King.

Born to reign in us forever,

Now thy gracious kingdom bring 

By thine own eternal Spirit

Rule in all our hearts alone;

By thine all-sufficient merit

Raise us to thy glorious throne.

Medicine from Sacred Writing:

"For what greater grace could God have made to dawn on us than to make His only Son become a son of man, so that  a son of man might in turn become the son of God. Ask if this were merited; for its reason, for its justification, and see whether you will find any other answer but sheer grace...Let us then rejoice in this grace."

 Saint Augustine  Sermon 185

ADVENT'S UNLIKELY OFFERING

Journeying seems so challenging, so exhausting, so fruitless at times. I have wondered this month if I am only, "Santa's helper," or a "handmaid of the Lord." The latter seems unlikely. I have baked and struggled, wrestled with self and welcomed others, but I have yet to make it  to the manger. The mall, yes, the grocery, many times, the parties, as best as I could. But the manger eludes me- I seem to be on the road to Bethlehem, but not arriving.

My heart seems a thousand steps behind me, the pace of life and its lures seem to slow my footsteps. Of course I am tired, aren't we all, but the call still comes from Hannah's haunting prayer: "I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of Him. So now I will give him to the Lord. For his whole life he will be given over to the Lord." 1 Samuel 1:27-28

Can I offer back to God the very gifts I prayed for? With a half-frozen heart I walk Advent steps towards Bethlehem and I realize Mary struggled as I do. Her life, her love, her family, other's concerns for her all had to be sacrificed on the way to bring the Light of the world to the Inn. Mary, indeed, was the Savior's first refuge, filled with grace she offered Him shelter under her heart, near her soul.

Can I shelter Him in my heart or will I continue on wearily walking through the motions of the Christmas chaos? My heart begins to thaw as the pain of offering all He has given finally touches me. I have numbed this emotion with baking cookies and sewing  matching pajamas; now I know I must go myself to the Inn and see the Christ-Child born. I cannot continue on the road, busy myself with passing time, so I allow the sadness of this great offering to hasten my feet to kneel at His. He alone can heal the sin and sorrow of the  world. His joy comes breaking through my Advent anguish.

Medicine from Sacred Scripture:

"Comfort, comfort My people, says your God.

Speak tenderly to Jerusalem, and proclaim to her that her hard service has been completed, that her sin has been paid for, that she has received from the Lord's hand double for all her sins."

 Isaiah 40:1-2

ADVENT'S UPSET

I have this illusion that Christmas is about a list, and gifts and presents and parties and family gathering, and it is, but there is a deeper meaning that fuels the outer purposes. God comes to me in the incarnation so that I might come to Him. I can rest my weary soul, and obey the tender call of the Savior: "Come to Me all you who are weary, and I will give you rest,  Matthew 11:28 

I can only give what I have received. If I have Christ's Presence within me, "Immanuel, God with us," Matthew 1:7 this peaceful Presence is mine to share. However, what I mostly have is the remnants of a lingering cold, the tiredness that comes with recovering, and the overwhelming sense that I am missing it~ missing the boat, missing the call to love and give and share. 

God's list looks nothing like mine. He interrupts my Advent with a simple question: "Are you being My light to a dark and lonely world?" That's all. Reign it in and ask Him to rain down from heaven His joy and Presence. The Gospel rings true as Jesus reminds me quietly, "Apart from Me you can do nothing." John 15:5 

But I am not thinking of vines and branches, I'm thing of holly and mistletoe and how disappointing circumstances can be~ words not written, hearts not understood, gatherings not taking place. In this He speaks so softly, "I am with you. I will never leave you or forsake you. Forsake your dreams and your ideals and be My love and light to those I bring. They may not be the ones you are looking and longing for, but they are Mine and I would have you love in My Name."

Who do you need to love today?

Medicine from Sacred Writings:

"Christ being Lord and King, and the King's Son, brought to us things far greater, being ever with the Father, and beholding Him continually." 

John Chrysostom Fourth Century

ADVENT'S HELP

Rain pours ceaselessly from the sky, as if heaven were weeping for us all. The weariness of the days and the demands of the season empty us even as we long to be filled. Surely we have need of One who can help, One who can save. The prophet Isaiah gets front and center stage during Advent for all the promises God makes through him of the coming Messiah: "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10

Struggling with loving and helping, I went to church discouraged and feeling ill-equipped for the day. We began by reciting a familiar prayer and the words struck me full-force: "Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy Name. Thy Kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth, as it is in heaven..." As I lifted my hands to pray, it was as if God reached down and said, "You are My child and I want you to take My hand and let me help you. And now, reach for your loved one's hand, they need your help, not your anxiety, they need your calming presence." 

 And when I got to the words, "Thy Kingdom come," God whispered, "My kingdom is within you, since I have come as Emmanuel. Whereever you are I desire to be with you. Look for Me, listen for Me and bring Me with you to every situation you find yourself in."

Emmanuel comes to us, personally and intimately, and because we have seen Him we both worship and adore; our souls finding their footing in Him and our feet running to shout the Good News. We say, "God be with you," or, "God help you," in times of crisis, how much more so at Advent when the Son comes down to bring God in the flesh, a tiny Babe, that we might have His Presence with us. Indeed, God is with us.

Is there a place in your life you need God with you? Ask Him to reveal Himself.

Medicine from Sacred Writing:

"The Word became flesh and dwelt among us," the Master took on Him the form of a  servant. For He  became the Son of man, who was God's own Son in order that He might make the sons of men to be children of God."

John Chrysostom Fourth Century

ADVENT'S PRESSURE

The pressure is exhausting. How many decorations adorn your home, how many cookies baked and eaten, how many parties invited to, responded to and attended? I feel like a Nutcracker set up to keep watch over the Christmas cheer! Today I rested my weary soul for a few moments at a friend's home: no rush, no hurry, no need to pick up, clean up, be "up." We sort of sat there being together. It was so refreshing, the being.

All the doing confuses me, I thought Christmas was about love and joy and, "peace on earth, good will towards men." How did we ever get so wrapped up in the trappings and the tree? Nothing inherently wrong with those, but they somehow steal joy instead of giving it and the insanity of the long "to-do list" leaves little left in us for loving.

When I am worn with trying to grasp the meaning amidst the madness I let Christmas music make my soul obey. It's as if I drag parts of me around saying, "enjoy this, you know you should enjoy these friends, this party, this breakfast, this tea," when what I'm really looking for is nothing this world has to offer. I am leaning hard against heaven hoping for a sign that I am not alone and help is on the way.

I crave peace and joy and long for holiness and contentment within. It isn't that I demand everything be wrapped up in a bow, but I have to have a holier calling on my frazzled pace. I need a song in my soul to carry me through the demands of the Advent days. Surely it shouldn't be this way, but somehow the world has crowded the manger out and we are required to pay some kind of fee for the season- be it in cookies or cakes, packages or parties.

Do you need to quiet your soul? Listen carefully, heaven and nature are singing.

Medicine from Sacred Writings:

"Glory to God in the Highest, and on earth peace, good will towards men. " Luke 2:14 If you desire to learn something from Cherubim and Seraphim, you shall hear the mystic song of His Holiness, and that, "heaven and earth are full of His glory." Isiah 6:3 If you enquire of the higher powers, you shall find that their one work is the praise of God."

John Chrysostom Fourth Century

ADVENT'S GIFT

Sometimes Advent doesn't look like what you think it will, take today for example, this day it looks like banana muffins. A friend's husband is deployed, four kids, three still at home, she hit her head and has a concussion; I have Christmas "things" to do and today it is to deliver muffins and a meal. My preparations for Christ's coming must include others, bringing them love and joy and strength through encouragement, There is no other way for the light of God to be shed abroad in the world unless I pick up my small candle and bring hope where I go.

The baked zitti will feed more than one hunger. We are hardly ever looking for merely food when we gather as families, we are longing for love and appreciation and to know we are cared for. When I freely give this, the light of Christ has dispelled some of my darkness. "Arise, shine, for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord rises upon you. See, darkness covers the earth and thick darkness is over the peoples, but the Lord rises upon you and His glory appears over you." Isaiah 61:1, 2

I am not boasting that I have made a meal and lifted a burden from a friend, I share because it is a choice to lay down my, "to do list" and listen to the still small voice of God:

 "You know you have chicken and zitti and cookies and muffins," 

"Yes, Lord, but I am so busy."

 "What you do for the least of these you do for Me." 

"But when Lord, I do not see you here as I struggle through the weight of my own agenda."

"You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart. If you love me you will keep My commands."

"But I am overwhelmed."

"Feed My sheep."

"yes, Father." 

So Advent comes crashing through my list, my longings, my desires and I make myself available to Him to bring a gift to another.

Where do you feel parched and weak? In need of a Savior?

Medicine from Sacred Scriptures:

"The wilderness will rejoice and blossom. Like the crocus, it will burst into bloom; it will rejoice greatly and shout for joy. .. they will see the glory of the Lord, the splendor of our God. Strengthen the feeble hands, steady the knees that give way; say to those with fearful hearts:

"Be strong, do not fear; your God will come, He will come with vengeance; with divine retribution He will come to save." Isaiah 35:1-4

ADVENT'S PROMISE

Handmade stockings hang around a simple mantle, no fancy decorations or silver, just a few tall nutcrackers the boys remind me fall on a regular basis. I feel a little sad somehow walking by those tall carvings, as if they, too, stand watch waiting for men to return. Christmas seems to be anticipating the arrival.

One flies home mid-December, another's last final is the 17th, in time for the Hobbit's premier showing, the other travels across country close to Christmas. They all gather soon, so why the nostalgia? It is the memories of children grown, of those already gone, and those who will gather in places I can't be. A niece's invitation pulls at heart -strings, the next generation's little ones gathered for donuts and laughter is the happiness holidays hold.

The tree, the lights, the gifts, purchased and made, all hold the magic of the waiting. I long for the presence of those held in my heart. So it is with the King of Kings. I know He dwells within, speaking, guiding, ever-with me, and yet I long for His coming, breaking into the world with joy and hope. How I need hope, to be reminded I am not alone, to feel the weight lifted from tired shoulders and His care and kindness showered on my fragile soul.

Voices gathered at the dinner table speak the Promise: "The Virgin shall be with child and will give birth to a Son and they will call him "Immanuel"- which means, "God with us." Matthew 1:23 Angelic annunciations are always surprising.Holding these words as an anchor for my soul, I embrace the God who comes to me in the manger and makes a way for me to know His love.

What is it you are waiting for this Advent season?

Medicine from Sacred Writing:

"For when human nature was fleeing from Him, and fleeing far away (for we "were far off"- Ephesians 2:13), He pursued after and overtook us. He showed that He has done this only out of kindness, and love, and tender care." 

John Chrysostom Fourth Century 

ADVENT'S COMFORT

How do you comfort others? How do you comfort yourself? I am an innate, natural nurturer and fill up lonely, empty spaces inside of others with food. I'm sorry, maybe that isn't wise or good or in any way helpful, but when you have been feeding little people for two decades it is hard to lose the habit. I sent one of the men-boys home with a bag of happiness. He grabbed a few sandwiches for his trip and then I packed a bag of baked goods: cookies and blueberry scones and giant snicker doodles. It's what I do.

Comforting myself, not so much. I don't turn to food or shopping or even face book to be nurtured, I usually turn inward and find either, "the light's on and Someone is home," or they are not. If I am living from self and sin it seems very dark within, but when I am living from love and light I can sense God's presence within me. Let me explain:

"If anyone loves Me, he will obey My teaching. My Father will love him and we will come to Him and make our home in him." John 14:23 I can welcome my Father in heaven with my obeidience and my love. I can choose to, "love others as God has loved me." John 13:34 So simple. As I love and welcome others my obedience makes God welcome in me. I wonder why God wishes to come and make His home in us? Because He loves us! "How great the love the Father has lavished on us that we should be called the children of God! And that is what we are! 1 John 3:1 Just as I wish for my children to come home, stay a while, share meals and enjoy each other's company, so, too, my Heavenly Father longs for me.

When I live from this love, the love of the Father delighting and dwelling in me, comfort and security wash over me like a waterfall. The morning prayers are so interesting today: "In our pain and anxiety, give us comfort and security." We are not told our pain or anxiety will be taken away, but that in them we can have the comfort and security of God's love and care.

The Promise is given: "For unto us a child is born, a Son is given, and the government will be upon His shoulders. And His name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace." Isaiah 9:2

What are you in need of this day? A Counselor? A Father? Peace? Light within? Comfort? Security? Find in Him and in His coming all you are longing for.

Medicine from Sacred Scriptures:

"'Comfort, comfort, My people,' says your God. Speak tenderly to Jerusalem, and proclaim to her that her hard service has been completed, that her sin has been paid for, that she has received from the Lord's hand double for all her sins." Isaiah 40:1-2

ADVENT'S ILLUMINING

Guests have come and gone as the bustling, generator-powered Thanksgiving has come to a close. I readied the house for men who previously inhabited little boy bodies to come and make their home with us for a few short days. Together we laughed and shared, cooked and cleaned and made the house a welcome for others. Napkins were folded into beautiful patterns and china and crystal adorned the table. All for guests, all for us to enjoy.

How is it then, that when the King is coming to dwell among us I struggle to make ready a place for Him? I have lists on lists already of all that is to be done before the men-boys arrive again for Christmas. If I can go to such great efforts to prepare for their homecoming, is it possible that I can make my heart a little more ready for the Holy One, the Most High.

Take Mary's, "yes" at  the annunciation. As He condescends to me will I make myself meek and lowly for Him? Will I live and love as He bids me to in the midst of a world weighed down with worry and cares too heavy and burdens too great for my small heart? "Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time. Cast all your cares on Him because He cares for you." 1 Peter 5:6-7  

I have been pondering for weeks this mystery of Him, the Son of God, come down from heaven for us, for me; that He would dwell in me is the proof of the power of God to redeem and save, ransom and heal. Anyone at anytime from anything. This Advent join me as day after day we make ourselves ready for the King of Kings to draw near. "Draw near to God and He will draw near to you." James 4:8

During Advent we, "clean house" giving God a holy place to dwell. Join me as we shine the light within.

Medicine from Sacred Writings :

"He tabernacles among us, that we might be able with much fearlessness to approach Him, speak to Him and converse with Him."

Chrysostom Fourth Century Homilies on St. John

TOO BUSY TO LOVE

I'm not sure where, when, or why I took this picture. I think it is from Vancouver last fall; the year has flown, children have grown - one of our sons spent the year on Thetis Island and has now returned to the East Coast. I, on the other hand, have stayed here raising others, trying to raise my chin to heaven asking for help: the daily struggle with fear keeps me from loving.

 What keeps you from sharing your heart and God's love with others?

How do I find myself on the storm-tossed sea of doubt and fear instead of nestled into a safe harbor of hope and peace? It isn't difficult, really, just examine your deepest fear. It often swirls around doing enough or being enough. With children your worry or challenge could be: "Am I doing enough, have I said enough, am I involved enough or too much? Will they be friends when they're grown. Do they have all they need for life and godliness?" If you don't have children you might ask: "Why, and what am I to do with all the love and life I have to give?" If you're single you worry: "Am I enough, will I have a companion, do I need one, who will provide for me, should I have gotten married or stayed married?" Life causes us to question our value, yet God asks us to bring our life to the table allowing His life in us to inform and transform us.

When I visited our oldest son last fall we biked over the Golden Gate Bridge. I want to be a bridge, living so others can see God in me and know His love by knowing me. Interesting, though, "Perfect love casts out fear." 1 John 4:18 When I am busy with fear I'm not loving. If I place my fears for my children, my family, my world and myself in His hands I am free to love. I had to trust our son as he led me through the streets of San Fransisco and over the bridge and I need to trust the God who made me with my questions and allow Him to have my fears and fill my heart with His love.

I met a lovely Mom here last fall, we had breakfast and she shared all her concerns for her son. As we feasted I thought of the many ways God longs to do this with us: He longs to sit and dine with us, have us share all our cares with Him and go away comforted. I find though, I can be too busy with my own thoughts to entertain the Divine.

How are you doing dining with God?

Medicine from Sacred Scriptures:

"Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him and he with Me."

 Revelation 3:20

THE GLORY OF THE TREES

Even in the dark the trees obey the call to show forth their colors: they will be glorious, whether the world watches or not, whether the sun shines on their splendor or the rains rip their very essence from them. I like the fall foliage on a bright day, today's weather fills me with inexplicable sadness: it seems too much, to burn with fire only to have the heavens rain down on the parade and leave less. Less brilliance, less beauty, less hue, as color is lost in a world of gray. So it is with our souls.

We prefer the splendid, the exciting, the thrilling, the glory of it all, but this will not sustain. Dark days will come. We must learn to rest like the trees: they gather all summer working their magic of making sugars and our air to breathe, and then, as light fades they stand aloof from the world's harshness and wait. For us, all our blessing is stored in our soul like some scientific equation:

Blessing + life = joy. Stored joy + hardship = perseverance. The sap, running hard after a cold winter, producing the sweetest of syrups, is merely the trees' stored nutrients. Gathering sunshine from the previous summer, allowing leaves to swirl mid-air, releasing the hope of life-sustaining processes, the tree welcomes winter and emptiness so that fullness and blessing will come again. Through it all there is glory: glory to gather light and glory to store it deeply within.

We miss those we love, we are torn from relationships we once held dear, children grow, friends move on, life changes, we are stripped like some oak in the woods, and yet, the oak stands strong, "like a tree planted by streams of water." Psalm 1:3 We are transformed as the colors of our life fade and our true glory is revealed. God's love and blessing is stored carefully in our being, and we wait  for the, "season of singing." Song of Songs 2:11  I am deeply affected by the evil in the world, not necessarily afraid, but troubled, that beauty and life and goodness are slipping from humanity, cutting off the source of living water. Jeremiah 2:13; John 4:14

One tree, though, braced for winter, will give off life giving oxygen when summer comes again. Will we breathe life and light into the world around, though all seems gray and lonely?

Medicine from Sacred Writings:

“Let us henceforth stand aloof from the things of this life, that we may find grace and mercy in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

John Chrysostom Fourth Century

FORESTS ABLAZE WITH COLOR

 It seems I am always running. How about you? Seasons come and go; leaves, set fire by some Heavenly paintbrush, cry for me to slow my pace, but I barely hear their whisper. How is it I am still deaf to their call as they burn brilliantly in the late afternoon sun; interesting that I wait till dusk to walk, as if I am afraid to confront their query. I stop, take a picture and move on, unmoved it seems. Life has to be lived, dishes washed, laundry folded, dinners made, and the leaf dances before my closed eyes. The window of my soul needs to be cracked open.

 The mountains and valleys are awash in light, as if the God of the universe spends the evenings dipping the edges of each tree in gold or crimson. He is powerful, the psalmist says, "The voice of the Lord twists the oaks and strips the forest bare. And in His temple all cry, "Glory!" Psalm 29:9 It is glorious, what He does to the trees, to the seasons, making them march at His command and sending His storehouses of snow for us to play in, as if He knew we were little children needing a gift. I marvel and yet gain perspective on my unwillingness to stop. Stopping in His temple to cry, "Glory!" is another matter entirely; I admire the canvas He creates, but tremble when His voice touches me.

He has already stripped so much, how can I trust Him to take the last little budding blooms and wipe them out as well? How in this world, bent with so much brokenness and evil, can I believe that He is good and will be faithful to those I love? (Crying, "Glory!" is affirming His holiness and goodness). If I keep making, baking, creating, cleaning and loving, in my broken way, maybe I can keep the tall trees safe from the One whose voice strips the forest bare. Maybe He will stop His stripping and let them flourish. I confuse bearing leaves with bearing fruit, that what looks like death on the outside is new life and greater growth from within.

I want  to cling to my small little flower, heedless to the majestic mountains that sing their song. I wonder if the symphony is made of color?

Medicine from Sacred Scripture:

"For My thoughts are not your thoughts and My ways not your ways," declares the Lord. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts. As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is My word that goes out from My mouth: It will not return to Me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it. You will go out with joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands." Isaiah 55:8-12

BOMB THREATS, EVIL AND CURTAINS

                                               A bomb threat created chaos this morning as police redirected traffic from our local high school and spent the better part of the day clearing the building. Why? Why this dark shadow falling on this community creating fear and concern. I am always fascinated that, 'perfect love casts out fear." 1 John 4:18. If I know myself to be loved and cared for then I can live outside of fear's strangle hold. I take precautions, of course, I do not live with my head in the sand, but neither do I become paralyzed in the face of an evil twisted world. I spent the day praying and sewing, creating beauty in a world hell-bent on destruction.

Rain drops fell all day, gathering the weight of the world's sorrow, maybe God's as well, as violence rages and threats of bombs bursting turn the life God has given us into a screening for a horror show; our daily life now somehow seems to be X-rated for violence. What God desires and continues to shower on the world is life. He sends it in creation, in the newborn, in the laughter of a toddler, in a  child's embrace. He comes to each of us: "I come that you might have life and life abundant." John 10:10  I can agree with God and create life and beauty and fight evil in this way: making curtains.

I can soften the harshness of an evil world, I can influence it for good and join with God in His creative life giving work. It may be small, but somehow hope finds wings here in believing I can make a difference. I can love and be kind and embrace another. J.R.R. Tolkien said in Return of the King, "Yet it is not our part to master all the tides of the world, but to do what is in us for the succour of those years wherein we are set, uprooting the evil in the fields that we know, so that those who live after may have clean earth to till. What weather they shall have is not ours to rule." pg. 851

Are you joining with God uprooting evil where you find it, in the fields you know: in your heart, in your family, in your friendships, in your community?

Medicine from Sacred Scripture:

"The word of the Lord came to me, saying, 

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appoint you...

to uproot and tear down, to destroy and overthrow, to build and to plant." 

Jeremiah 1:5, 10

A HARVEST OF LOVE

The fields harvested under a blazing blue sky captured my attention, slowly I pulled to the side of the road to soak in the pastoral setting. I am mesmerized by the vastness of farms waving with corn or land freshly mowed and hayed; surely years of childhood play between stalks of growing grain have shaped my soul and held my longing heart in open spaces and sustaining fields. Mounds of collected hay makes me wonder about what we gather through the years, not just in the season of growing, but how what we plant deeply within us comes to fruition and even defines us.

We build fences to hold in what is ours and that which we do not want others to touch or tread upon; secretly we sow into our emotional lives and later realize we do not always reap what brings life. We pile up resentment into bales of anger; our hurts fill our barns to overflowing with an unwillingness to extend mercy. Our whole interior world can hold so much pain that we are paralyzed by the gleanings we have gathered and these fuel our continued outrage and silent fury. If this is hard for you to believe, think for a moment about how you process the pain of the world right now: some of us go to fear, some are furious, some terrified, but few of us have learned to lean into the One who, "is before all things and holds all things together." Colossians 1:17 

We reap what we sow, examined or unexamined, intended or not. Peer carefully into the storehouses of your soul and ask yourself if you find faith, hope and love there. Only three things remain, Paul tells us at the end of 1 Corinthians 13, "And now these three things remain, faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." Jesus gives startling words to us in the Beatitudes, "Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you." Matthew 5:44 Let us continue to pray for those being persecuted, yes, but let us also pray for the persecutors. Are we, "rooted and established in love," as Paul prays in Ephesians 3:17? We cannot hold both fear and love in the ground of our being; as we cultivate love we find fear has less of a hold on us. We are loved and can gather grace and extend mercy from this place, even for the ones who persecute us.

The fields are ripe for harvest, what is being harvested in yours?

Medicine from Sacred Writings:

"For not by laboring and sweating, not by fatigue and suffering, but merely as being beloved of God we receive what we receive."

John Chrysostom   Fourth Century

OVERCOME EVIL WITH GOOD

I couldn't write yesterday, I could only pray. It seems the world can't bear the evil it must. Dark clouds on so many horizons gather while we sit watching, preparing, perhaps even expecting. In Romans 8:22 Paul says, "We know that the whole of creation has been groaning as in the pangs of childbirth right up until the present time." The world under our feet must shudder as the darkness of men's hearts spills onto its soil.

Stories filled our minds and hearts as we remembered: heroes who lived and heroes who died and so it will continue to be. "Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." Romans 12:21 In our own neighborhood a local store is held up and the children cowered in fear as they experienced lock-down in the darkness of possible terror. We are overcome by evil when are emotions are locked down by fear.

We overcome evil with good by emptying our souls of the debilitating darkness that fear brings and live in the light. The paralyzing pain of loss and grief in the world does not need to cripple us; we can bring life. I will need to clear my own heart of hatred, of my little violence done to others, and extend forgiveness to all and be willing to consider God's mercy.

I have the smallest of candles, a mere flicker amidst the world's great darkness, but I can be a light and my light, along with yours, will begin to dispel the darkness. I can believe that God is greater than any evil known to man, I can choose to trust in His mercy for those who are suffering. I can hope."You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead, they put it on its stand and it gives light to the whole house.
 In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good works and praise your Father in heaven."  Matthew 5:14-16

What kind of light are you bringing to those around you?

Medicine from Sacred Writing:

The command to forgive others sets us free from all revengeful passion; while promising in return for this to pardon us also, God holds out good hopes, and instructs us to have high views of the  unspeakable mercy of God towards men."

John Chrysostom    Fourth Century

PACKING FOR LIFE

What does this look like? This time of moving and plans and changes, as if we can pack a car full of our belongings, hoping our hearts and emotions will follow. We build an existence on one coast and tell ourselves we'll  live on another, whole, free, and engaging the world in a meaningful way. Many do this, some never will. It isn't a requirement, but if you embark on such a journey it will suck the life out of you, this moving, and it will give it back again.

My solution for the twenty somethings: make them cookies. Provisions; a taste of home along a very long road. What will we choose to take with us as we make our way in the world? What do we keep with us if our way is closer to home? Love would be a good thing to carry in our hearts. We are always loved. "Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul." Psalm 143:8 When we walk through transitions and face the unknown the anchor for our souls is love; we must wake each morning and remind ourselves, "I am loved, I am loved, I am loved," the fear will subside for, "perfect love casts out fear." 1 John 4:18

Hope would be necessary food for our hearts. The way is often lonely and treacherous, perhaps not in a physical way, but emotionally we lose our bearings, haven't found our footing, this is when we must trust. We speak to ourselves, again, and say, no matter what is swirling around us, "Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness." Lamentations 3:21-22 It may be as simple as reminding ourselves of the One who cares for us: "Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?" Matthew 6:26

The journey home to ourselves requires us to pack our own suitcases, decide what we will keep or discard from years of  life, and cherish what remains. A deep sense of belonging and being cared for needs to be cultivated in us so we can effectively live in a broken and fallen world. We choose love, keep hope alive and deepen our faith in God and others as we open our eyes to His provision. He promises, "Cast all your anxiety on Him, for He cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7

Medicine from Ancient Writings:

“God's works move and breathe; they use and judge the things of sense. The workmanship of such an Artist, will you dishonor Him? Yes, when He not only fashioned you, but placed you, like a ward, in the care and guardianship of yourself alone, will you not only forget this, but also do dishonor to what He committed to your care! If God had entrusted you with an orphan, would you have neglected him? He has delivered you into your own care, saying, I had none more faithful than Myself; so keep this person for Me, and preserve him as he is by nature: modest, faithful, high-minded, a stranger to fear, to passion, to agitation."

Epictetus second century philosopher

NATALIE'S GARDEN

"Do you hear the bicycle's bell? It's Natalie, she will ride through the park and come to the garden." All week I prayed Natalie would appear, as if a single face would help me make sense of the poverty and need found in the brokenness of the world. Years ago I had come to this community with the youth of our church but I could not process the overwhelming stories, the raw pain and sadness I encountered, so I worked in the community garden. I weeded as if pulling crab grass could change lives; it felt hopeless and useless, but we created space for beauty to take root.

As I stepped into the community park this year I was surprised to find the Seeds of Strength Neighborhood Garden well cared for and growing, yet there were still a few empty planting boxes. We worked on the big picture, installing a gutter for the rain barrel and creating a  compost bin, but I waited for the small miracle, the face of a little child. She arrived on Thursday afternoon, ringing her bike bell, as if to let the world know she was on her way. She broke open the hearts of the girls on my garden team and she solidified the purpose in my heart, to sow love, to work at bringing beauty, to never give up hope.

A girl's dream, a garden of her own, replete with the touches that childhood brings: painted rocks and blooming flowers, restored my dream as well. Pouring love and energy into the world around us creates beauty and joy. I am merely a  shadow in the picture of Natalie's garden and life, but we have touched her with our love and she has changed us. We hope, we work, we pray, we love, all in the Name of the One who brings joy and transformation to a hurting world, to a single life.

Who and how are you loving today?

Medicine from Sacred Scripture:

"Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will reap generously... you will be made rich in every way so that on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God."

 2 Corinthians 9:6,11